Its Not Easy To Be Me: Am I stupid ?

Yes I am stupid ! My beasties said..stop text him okay..okey fine! i feel happy when receiving her text ..yes I know..his not my bf but his my xbf..am I stupid for making myself like a shit again ! I know it my fault..am I stupid to show what I have done to my body..I just want her to feel regret by leaving me 1 years ago..

But I am wrong..he still love her gf..I know..how could he text me and treat me like her gf..come babe come hug me first before you sleep..come baby girl give me a gud morning kiss ! Am I cheap to her by saying the word that not suppose to her to say..I’m not your gf anymore..why you feel attractive to me now..why not dulu before I kurus mcm nie..or you just what to playing around with me..I’m sorry Wan Farizul Rahimi..I did’t meant to do this to you..! Yes I’m try to love you..but I still need some time babe..

It’s not bcoz I’m still love my xbf babe..but..it’s all bout my heart..maybe I still trauma and still reflected bout what he doing to me..

My life doesn’t always look exactly like I want it to. I spend many days On9 alone in my living room, when I’d rather going to class laughing like no day tomorrow more with my fella fwen..just simple life and bored..I just want to find some things that can full my life..can be my live so mean..until I meet you Wan Farizul Rahimi..you change my life a lot..you always giving me strength when I really need it..you treat me like you wife..serious your responsibility supposed my father do it..but you do it well babe..I’m just like a person who doesn't know how to appreciate the person who love me very much..I just the stupid person who chase people that not my love anymore..

What should I do..open my heart to person that I just know 1 year and love me very much or forget the person who leaving me and now come to my life..